There is much confusion concerning karma, it isn’t something that accumulates and then judges what retribution will follow, no, karma happens all the time and every day. Each moment that your impure thoughts and feelings live their life through you, you are creating these things in your life but in ways you do not expect. Because you are thinking and feeling the same way, you keep creating the same external environment over and over and react in a similar way that leads to similar thoughts and feelings that reinforce those same sort of conditions in your life. Untilyou change these patterns that, by repetition, have become hard wired in your brain.
Let’s consider the fact that I’ve asked you to daily practice in the first period to look back at an emotional event as if looking at a stranger so your emotional attachment to the event is somewhat less and to practice meditation and generate this non conditional love. The conditioning hardwire seeks to experience what it is familiar with as that is the only way it can live through you so it will generate thoughts like I am tired, so not today or I am too busy etc. And it will also generate associated feelings to which you respond, in other words it seeks to make you uncomfortable with change. Your body as a whole does this all the time, you might want to change your diet but the body doesn’t want to change what it knows so it will send thoughts such as I will start next week, it makes me feel weak or I need different things to eat. And if you do start despite the mind coming up with excuses then it will trigger feelings of discomfort or hunger etc. Not realizing these thoughts and feelings are not created by you but through you, you identify with them. They, these conditions, are ruling you and their awareness is heightened and see reasons, excuses and causes in their likeliness all around them. The more we have let this happen the bigger the role of the actors become (puppets on the stage) and lesser and lesser light of the flame can shine through and the further you are away of the frequency and power of the light in the back of the cave. And eventually it will withdraw.
I need to mention that this conditioning is not just of the things mentioned earlier but they are in our theories and beliefs too. They all get hard wired (strengthening the connections of the synapses). Scientists and priests alike look into the world through these conditioned viewpoints and it too will trigger defence or excuse etc. Not to go onto the unknown path, seeking the known. Even the innovative among them loose the very ability to be open (close to the flame they experienced for a moment) because ego, pride, selfishness, greed etc. can easily feed themselves on these things too. I bet you’ve come across those who are full of themselves.
Now most of our thoughts and feelings come from our past experiences and therefore our memories, your brain is the hard disc that records everything you’ve learned and experienced. When you have an experience (aware of it or not) through all of your senses the data that flow into the brain cause neurons to organize themselves into networks making patterns that reflect the outer experience and as soon as it makes those patterns the brain produces a chemical which is called a feeling or emotion and tends to make more long term memories as it sees or experiences similar events. As these connections or patterns cause these wirings to become stronger and stronger and the emotional chemicals strengthen memories (even if you are not aware of it happening) and help you remember. So learning something intellectually also causes new neural networks to form, and experience then solidifies them due to the chemical emotion attaching giving it a feeling. The stronger the feeling/chemicals the easier you remember. Because whatever you were hearing or seeing in that moment changed how you felt and that moment you felt different your brain altered your state of awareness and paid attention to whatever it was that caused it. So thoughts of the brain and feelings of the body create your state of being. These two combined and repeated often enough, determine an attitude, so if you have negative thoughts that are connected to bad feelings you’ll express that in those moments, so those thoughts and feelings create your state of being, and attitudes are shortened states of being and when you add them up they start to create a belief that is just a thought you keep repeating over and over again and solidify the wiring in the brain. And this conditioning creates the filters through which you see. And what’s more, these experiences are connected to how we feel and when our beliefs are then challenged, it typically doesn’t feel right. So thinking and feeling and feeling and thinking over time, let’s say for example having insecure thoughts making them feel it, cause more insecure thoughts and so strengthen the wiring of these pathways in the brain and chemicals/feelings which lead to more similar thoughts etc. These repeated cycles over time condition the body to subconsciously become the mind, once the body and mind are wired it becomes a habit. These unconscious thoughts and unconscious emotions/habits are the software that run the program.
So these repeating patterns are the personalized belief systems and subconscious states of being, be it beliefs in god, a scientific theory, relationships, health and love, and all are based on past experiences but most of those beliefs we don’t even know we believe because we think they are true because they are not acting in a conscious mind. These patterns of belief form what we call perceptions and have everything to do with the behaviours we show and the things we create and choices we make. Beliefs are mainly states of subconscious being, meaning that most people view their lives through the past unconsciously, and it gives the impression of seeing reality. Have you ever done the “find the differences in two pictures” and took time to find them? And once found they are easy to spot? It’s not the eyes that see but your mind. So often reality is based on the memory in the brain. If something isn’t known it’s hard to recognize, but when the past overlays the present with our memory, we see them. That’s how our conditioning colours our present. Just think of the fear associated with that snake and making you jump when seeing a green garden hose in the corner of your eye.
All these conditionings, and many you’re not even consciously aware of, dictate your present and determine your future. So you’ll have to make a decision with very firm intention that in order to change any belief or perception about ourselves and our lives, it has to have the high level of importance we place in that decision and carries a level of energy that is more powerful than the hardwired programming of the brain and emotional conditioning of the body. And so the body will have to respond to that new mind, which also means that the choice becomes an experience that you’ll not forget because the internal experience begins to reorganize the pathways in your brain and sends new emotional signatures in your body and becomes free from that past. And this eventually leads to true free will. But please remember that replacing memories with other memories isn’t the kind of seeing we are aiming at eventually. So ask yourself who causes the limitations in your life? I am sure you’ve heard of people doing unbelievable feats in order to safe a loved one. They weren’t thinking “oh my god I can’t lift up that beam to free him”. In that moment they are not acting from a conditioned state of mind but move in absolute certainty. The energy to do so is inherent in all matter, meaning many of your limitations are due to the conditioning. And pay attention, your mind will likely make excuses wanting to hold on to its old idea that you can’t, better the devil you know than the one you don’t. The unknown is something the brain will try to avoid. Whispering I can’t, I’ve tried, it’s not my thing. Or for instance the fear off asking for a job, a raise or help, or expressing our feelings towards someone in case it’s rejected, so we continue and keep it to ourselves carrying a false hope that eventually leads to disappointment, regret and pain. While expressing or asking doesn’t insure the answer you wish for, it would at least give you the answer that enables you to either share or move on. How many stay in a situation they are unhappy in? Always talk about moving, do the job they really want, but never do? If ideas and dreams are not followed by action, they stay ideas and dreams.
These kind of things strengthen the actors on the stage and as you get older your inner light starts to dim.
Back again to your practice of looking at past emotional moments as if looking at someone else over and over so the emotion doesn’t draw you in and makes you see through it. By this practice you’ll be able to see a little more than at the actual time it happened, but what is most important is eventually seeing how that limited view back then played a role in your life that followed in ways you were not or hardly aware off. This knowledge was important so that you will stay more alert when thoughts and feelings arise, and start to identify less with it, and at the same time override this wiring of the brain with the newly gained insights, so your view becomes clearer and less influenced by those limiting points of view.
And so we can also overcome its excuses not to set aside time every day to practice meditation. It would be best in the morning, if you wake up 15 minutes earlier it would be enough. Your mind is also less cluttered with the daily things then. Not following your breath but breathing in through the nose and imagining drawing the breath from your feet all the way to the top of your head and let it flow back to the feet with breathing out, eventually becoming aware of the energy flowing. Once you are able to be aware of this energy flow you can raise its speed going up and down, and by then you do your breathing without it being what leads the flow. Over time it will be so fast that it will be your whole body that is filled without the sense of it going up and down.
Do this without clinging on to thoughts that might arise. Continue this practice so that you can do this every morning before you start your day.
Do not forget to practice to remain alert during the day that it doesn’t trick you to identify with the puppets/actors on the stage! And keep in mind that each and every one suffers from that enslavement, so be compassioned and forgiving for they do not know.
And do whatever you can not to add to their enslavement with a loving care whenever the opportunity rises. Even if it doesn’t seem to have an effect, it will have an effect on you. And make it your nature, a nature closest to the light.
01-03-2020
Moshiya van den Broek